One television show during COVID-19 has had people across the US thinking hard about the complexities of privilege, parenting, and motherhood.
Little Fires Everywhere showcases the drama between two polar families - suburbanite Shaker Heights residents, the Richardsons, and a meandering mother and daughter duo, the Warrens. When describing the character dynamics, the book’s author, Celeste Ng, explained, “The story is not just about two women who don’t get along. Their conflict stems from the fact that the [mothers] are not meant to connect because they are constrained by their circumstances.”
Ng’s description is probably best brought to life in Episode 4, when Elena, a white, suburban, upper-middle-class mother who works part-time yells at Mia, a black, full-time, single mother,
“A good mother makes good choices!” to which Mia responds, “You didn’t make good choices! You had good choices.”
This quote comes with an important context. Beyond Elena’s racial and class privileges, her parents were some of the first residents of Shaker Heights. They not only helped develop the picturesque suburban community, but they also owned houses and rental properties there. As newlyweds with young children, Elena lived in one of her parents’ properties, giving the family both social access to the community and the opportunity to save cash before they could afford a home of their own there. Living in Shaker Heights is synonymous with success, especially because of its fantastic school district.
Elena criticizes Mia for moving her daughter from school to school, town to town, without really understanding her circumstances. And when Mia’s daughter, Pearl, finally attends school in Shaker Heights, Pearl is flabbergasted by the planetarium that is a part of this community’s public school.
In contrast, Mia’s background is a story of economic struggle. Desperate to pay for her college degree, Mia agrees to conceive a child for a wealthy NYC family struggling with infertility. However, she soon grows to love the child she is bearing. Broke and alone, she drops out of college to keep her daughter and become a mother.
Neither Elena nor Mia are in the wrong in their motherhood journey, but there is an important reminder in their argument. There are many, many families who do not have access to good choices. For example, many parents cannot afford Shaker Heights-like neighborhood access to education or to private schools. Their hands are tied, and their only choice is a struggling school district embedded in poverty. In fact, Mia only ends up in Shaker Heights because Elena has called the police on her, feels guilty, and rents her an apartment at an extremely discounted price.
Describing Elena’s criticism of Mia, Reese Witherspoon (who played Elena) stated, “Despite [Elena’s] intelligence and social grooming, she has a deeply embedded lack of awareness of her privilege. She’s constructed a life that’s impervious to the world she lives in. She’s so comfortable in her social standing and her wealth that she feels entitled to analyze anyone outside her sphere but never takes a hard look at her own shortcomings.”
In other words, Elena cannot see beyond her circumstances. She forgets that not all families have had access to the choices she’s had. If you have enjoyed Little Fires Everywhere while you’ve been at home, consider this show as an opportunity to reflect on the choices you’ve had. Then, maybe consider supporting organizations or policies that give people, who do not have access to good choices, better ones. Want to read more about giving families better educational options? Check out some of our latest posts: